marriage

For Lovers: Subtle Differences in Conversation Make a Big Difference in Connection

I was working with a couple the other day who have been married a long time.  Some big differences had grown in their relationship and they are exploring whether continuing their relationship will be right for both of them.  

Within a short time it became clear that deep in their hearts they both want the marriage to work.  But they often get caught in some dynamics that make them both feel lonely.  It is also clear that the differences they have will not go away and they wonder if this marriage will allow them to live wholeheartedly.  

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Attachment in Adulthood

In a recent post, I wrote about the attachment journey that young parents naturally embark on as they have children. With parenthood, attachment becomes a focal point. But attachment needs aren’t just for babies! It’s important for all adults – married people, single people, adult siblings, adult children or parents of adult children – to

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The Strength of Inter-dependency

This is a guest post from my respected colleague Robin Cohen.  Robin is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker who is certified in Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples.  She is in private practice in Herndon, Virginia.  Robin completed an intense post-Master’s program in Marriage and Family Therapy at Virginia Tech in 1994.  She subsequently became an

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Why do you have sex?

There was a fascinating article in the Wall Street Journal recently about what motivates couples to have sex and how the motivation impacts their relationship.  The article explains that “new research from the University of Toronto shows that the reasons why partners have sex in the first place also significantly affect marital satisfaction. And a

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Inspirational Quote: Meant to Be

Sometimes we are lead to believe that if we have a healthy relationship we will not fight, we will be able to avoid contention at all times, we will always be there for each other, and our marriage will always feel strong and secure.  As we learn about and strive for values of love, respect

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Date Night – Friday, September 13

I’m really excited for our date night.  Here are some details in case you are wondering: What’s the plan? 7:00 – 8:00 p.m.        Relationship education and tools for connection 8:00 – 8:30 p.m.        Couples break for some guided application in a private setting 8:30 – 9:00 p.m.    

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Book Review: Man’s Search for Meaning

Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl My rating: 5 of 5 stars This really is a must read for every one who lives and breathes. It was interesting to read it as a therapist. I was expecting something more like a self help book, but was intrigued to find it to be a

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What is love, anyway?

The other day I read a sad, sad description of love in this article (which ironically, is about my beloved city of Chicago…to me the cold is just a testament to it’s awesomeness…“the largest American city that deals with negative-twenty-degree wind chills on a regular basis.”  It has to be really awesome to draw so

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